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Nothing

Nothing to say

Nothing to do

All we do is wait

Wait for what?

Why are we waiting?

Everything is falling

But no one does anything

Why?

Why don't we do anything?

Why, the most unexplainable word ever

Is so explainable to you

Thriving

We're all waiting

Waiting to be good enough

But nothing is good enough

So all we do is thrive, and thrive

Just to be good enough

While we do not think we're good enough

We thrive

Nothing else

All we do is wait and thrive to reach their high standards

But we are all thriving, ready to escape

Comparing

I am always comparing

Comparing myself to you

Comparing myself to him

Comparing myself to people who are good enough

I am not good enough

I am not confident enough so my insecure thoughts, automatically go away

But does being confident make you not insecure?

I guess not

Because even the people who seem confident, underneath it all, are insecure

Tears

....What better time to write poetry then when your crying?

When you can't hold anything in anymore

You cry

And as the tears drop down by your face

You think...

Why?

Why is everything deem to be...so bad?

So crummy?

So....different.

Nothing is the same anymore

We're not the same anymore

Reality is finally setting in

And I'm feeling all the pains of it.

All the true pains of Pandora's box

Except

I have no hope

Tired

I'm tired of this

Tired of you

You, controlling me

Like some puppet

Is that what I am to you? Some puppet?

When everyone left you, because you weren't good enough like I was

Who was still there for you?

WHO? Tell me. Who?

But now, that your good enough, you treat me like a puppet.

A sick, tired, confined, puppet

And I'm tired of it

Tired of everything

One day, I'll be good enough

Then you'll see who the real puppet is.

Pretending For The Lights

We're...always pretending

Hiding, our true selves

To be accepted

It's only for the lights

Deep down under...We're the complete opposites, aren't we?

It's just the lights

Watching us....

I want to start over

And stop pretending

Since it hurts so much to pretend

You never know anything anymore

Because we're always pretending

Pretending.....One day someone will find out

And pretending for the lights

Will turn into accepting the lights

When the day comes where we accept the lights

Where will we be?

Standing, maybe 10, 20, years from now?

That is, if we're still even there

Grow up

Growing up, the hardest thing to do

All I want to be is a kid

I've lost all the innocence I've had.....

Where has it gone?

I want to start over

Before it was like this

Where we work all day, and sleep all night

Nothing else, Nothing more

Why? Why can't we be children?

We all have to grow up,

But what if it pains you to?

Pains you to grow up?


One Day

One day, I'll be a better me

I'll be confident

I'll be stronger

I'll be better in everything I lack

One Day, You'll be a better you

You'll listen

You'll know me even more

You'll be better everything you lack

But today, I'll be a worst me

I'll be insecure

I'll be weak

I'll be worst in everything I lack

But today, You'll be a worst you

You'll not listen

You'll know the basic things about me

You'll be worst in everything you lack

Feeling Faint

Words, jumbled in my head

Where have you gone, and left me?

I wait here at the hollow’s eve

You’ve left me, completely as the wind blows my hair

Nothing is darker than dawn

Not even my heart, completely drifted away from my head

It tells me to go one way

I cower over it

Again and again and again

I see the immediate hatred in your eyes as you stare at me

You hate me, with a burning passion

Yet, I love you, with a burning passion

Nothing exceeds how much I love you,

Except for your hate

Your deep, deep, hatred

Hatred of me, that is

Your stare kneads into my skin

I can feel my head going faint

I can feel the sun rising

The thing I feel most, is remorse

Remorse for all the things that have happen

As I fall down at the bay,

I know what will happen next for sure

I will be dead.

Because your eyes, I have pierced through my heart

Spontaneous

I wish I could be spontaneous

Jump out of my chair, cry without a care

Tell you the truth

Tell everyone the truth

Being spontaneous isn't just being carefree

It's being you.

Yourself, and only you

I want to be that person

You were spontaneous

You're always spontaneous

And I love it, every single part of it

Running

I'm not going to run away anymore

I can't run away anymore, and I won't

I have to face the truth

The truth of you never being able to be mine

Your always running though

Running after her

Her, who doesn't care what you think

Her, who only sees you as the background

I see you, as the big picture

The protagonist

You'll never see it though

Because I run as fast as I can, so you won't see it

One day, I'll stop running

And I'll look back on the tracks I've left

Then I'll realize,

Finally realize you aren't good enough for me

But I'm not good enough for me either

Brown

Your hair, it's brown

Brown in the sunlight, when it hits you best

That's the only way I want to see you

Ever.

Looking Back

I keep looking back, when days were better

When I could be free and not care about anything

But I look back, I look back at you

How were we back then?

We were so simple

There was nothing to fight or argue about

We weren't at our necks with insults, or crying

I've stopped crying

About you, that is

I cry about other things now

Other things you just don't seem to understand

Or you just don't want to deal with it anymore

Deal with me

I dare you

How you always challenged me to be better

I want to be challenged again

But, you won't challenge me. So who will?

Mean

No one seems to understand

Understand how much it hurts

No one takes anything seriously

They just brush it away

I used to be able to do that

I can't do that anymore

I face things head on now

But I somehow find myself running away

You, hitting me with everything you know about me

All my flaws, which is everything

I will face you one day

I will be better than you

I will hit you with everything I have

So we are equal, equal foes.

Stop

Stop it

Stop everything

Stop the way you stare at her

Even if she won't notice you

Stop hurting me

Your not making yourself any better

I understand you, so why?

Why do I put up with you and her?

Even if she doesn't see you the way I do?

I just want time to stop

So I can see clearly

See everyone clearly, and maybe they'll see me clearly

What I mean, what I do

Is all for you

Waiting

I always wait for you

Wait for you to learn

Wait for you to understand

I can't keep doing this

Doing this to myself

The pain is unbearable

But so is being without you

I will always wait, even if I can't

Without you I can't go on

Neither can you.

Wish

I wish for a lot of things

I wish for you

I wish for you to notice

Notice me

I wish for you to realize things

Things like, who's been here for you

Who's always supported you?

Well? Who? Tell me who.

Maybe when I wish

They'll come true

Then you'll finally see the truth of things

But for now....

You'll be as blind as ever

Never

You'll never see me

When I cry

When I smile

When I need you

You'll never give up

Give up on her

She never gave you a chance

But I have

Afraid

I'm afraid

I'm afraid of facing the truth

When the truth has a face itself

I'm afraid of you

When your nothing but an imagination

So why?

Why must I be so afraid?

What if there finally is a greater good?

And that greater good, is meeting you,

Even if your just my imagination.

Dead

Your all gone

Dead, spoiled, rotten bodies

I linger over your grave

It's as cold as ever

You were always so cold

So, your the same.

You never did live,

But you were never dead.

Your body is so rotted, yet nothing.

Nothing is inside of it to think.

Nothing is there anymore....Therefore...

You are dead.

Dead to me.

Love

Seemingly, the most cherished thing in the world

But even I can't love

Because the only thing I love is you

And just looking at you sets a curse upon myself

I try, I try so hard to tear myself away

Tear myself apart, that is

I'm always bringing myself down

But, why?

Because your always bringing me up

I feel as if I was fine, you'd leave me

Because there is no reason to talk anymore

Is there?

We're not as close as we used to be

We've lost our touch

Now your bringing up other people

And I'm slowly bringing myself down with it...